A Simple Letter Can Change Everything
by GeniaTheParadox
Summary: In the wake of her engagement to Finn, Rachel receives a heartfelt letter from Quinn and everything changes.


I got the idea for this bit of smutty Faberry romance just after the travesty that was Rachel agreeing to marry Finn. Even my mum was horrified, and she doesn't care about Glee nearly as much as I do. Naturally, it's difficult for me to live in a world where Faberry isn't canon but a Finchel wedding is. But where the show fails, so fanfiction steps in to right the wrongs.

But yeah. Reviews would be lovely thanks.

And obviously I do not own Glee.

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><p><strong>A Simple Letter Can Change Everything<strong>

_Rachel,_

_I would never be able to say any of this out loud, or in song – even the Glee Club method of choice for expressing ones feelings has failed me – so I thought that a letter would be the best way to tell you everything. _

_I think that you're making a huge mistake in marrying Finn, and not just for all the reasons that everyone else is saying. I mean, yes, you guys are really young so this seems a little hasty, and it kind of seemed as if you only said yes to his proposal in the end because you thought you weren't getting into NYADA (of course, now you're a finalist. Congratulation, I always knew you would make it). But there's another reason why I think what you're doing is a mistake. I don't think you should marry Finn because he couldn't ever love you like I do._

_I know this is coming from out of nowhere and your first thought might be that this is all a joke. But it's not. I mean, it was only quite recently that you and I even became proper friends. We've always been rivals, usually because of Finn, and I regret this now. Finally my life is free of drama and I have a clear head about my life and my future, and this has made me see everything that previously I'd been trying to ignore. I've had feelings for you for a long time, longer than I would ever let myself admit, even in my head. I was so obsessed with being popular and having the perfect life that I wouldn't let myself feel anything other than contempt for you, I wouldn't admit to myself that it was you that I really wanted – not Finn or Puck or Sam, but _you_. _

_I'm letting go of my past, but I wish that I could change things between us. I wish I could take back every mean word I ever said to you, every bad thing ever I did to you, and every hurtful name ever I called you. Back when I was Head Cheerio, before I joined Glee Club or had my baby, whenever I called you ugly it wasn't because I actually thought you were ugly. You're not. You're beautiful. I just hated myself for thinking that you were. I hoped that if I called you ugly enough times then I'd start to believe it and I'd stop noticing all the beautiful things about you. It's stupid, I know. But what I felt for you scared the hell out of me. Popular head cheerleaders, good Christian girls and future Prom Queens aren't supposed to have feelings for other girls, especially (forgive me) losers like you. I wish now that I hadn't let all that superficial stuff get in the way of who I really am and what I really feel._

_I think it was a number of things that made me want to finally tell you all this. Senior year, me getting into Yale... you telling me that Finn had proposed. All I know is that I didn't want to end our time at school without ever telling you how much I love you. _

_In a perfect world I would have told you all of this a long time ago, and I would have said it to your face. I would have told you straight away how much you mean to me, how you've managed to get me through the hard times in my life and made me feel better about myself, even though all I've ever done is hurt you, and even though I don't deserve your compassion and your understanding. I would have told you from the off how special you are. I love you, Rachel. You're so beautiful and talented and passionate. I don't expect you to feel the same way. I know that you love Finn, that's why you're marrying him. I don't expect anything from you at all. I just had to get this off my chest. _

_Quinn _

I had lost count of the amount of times I had read this letter since I found it slipped into my locker, but every time I read it or even thought about it I just wanted to cry. At first I thought that it must be some kind of joke, that this couldn't possibly be real, but the more I read it the more I saw the raw honesty in every word. Quinn's impossibly neat handwriting faltered slightly as it got to the end of the letter and a few words were even smudged, as if tears had hit the page. This had to be real.

So now I waited in my bedroom, the letter still in my hand and Finn's engagement ring in the other. I needed to talk to Quinn, but I really didn't have any idea what I was going to say. It had been awkward enough just asking Quinn to meet at my house. My suspicions that the letter was real were only confirmed when I went to speak to her after Glee Club; I'd never seen her blush so much before, especially while talking to me.

I honestly didn't know how I felt about Quinn's letter. Before I'd been sure that I would never change my mind about marrying Finn. He was the love of my life, no matter what anybody said. Becoming a NYADA finalist didn't change anything, not really. But now with this letter... I just didn't know. I mean, don't get me wrong, I knew I still loved Finn. But I also couldn't stop thinking about how I would have felt if things had been different, if Quinn had had the courage to tell me how she felt ages ago. I'd never had those kinds of feelings for girls, of course. But Quinn wasn't just a girl, she was... _Quinn Fabray._ She was the prettiest girl I had ever seen, and was probably most likely to ever see in my life. And she thought that _I _was beautiful. Something inside me seemed to swell as I thought of her words – _beautiful and talented and passionate_ – something that made me want to smile and cry in equal measure.

I was startled out of my thoughts by the doorbell. I quickly folded Quinn's letter and put it on my bedside table along with the ring, and rushed downstairs. Quinn blushed once I answered the door. Even the way she blushed was prettier than the average girl. It was more like the way a Jane Austen character blushes, with a delicate rosy circle on each cheek, as opposed to her whole face going blotchy red like when I blushed.

"Hi," she said quietly, looking at her feet.

"Thanks for coming, Quinn," I said, stepping aside to let her in. "I wasn't sure you would."

She didn't say anything, but her cheeks turned steadily rosier. I led the way up to my bedroom – my Dads weren't home but I still wanted to make sure we were totally in private – and she sat awkwardly on the edge of my bed. I went to sit next to her, making sure there was plenty of space between us, and took her letter out of my bedside cabinet. Her eyes widened when she saw it. I'd never seen her look so embarrassed.

"I... I think we should talk about this," I said tentatively.

Quinn still didn't say anything. Her hands twisted in her lap and she looked at the floor rather than at me.

"Is it real?" I asked anxiously. "I mean, did you... did you mean everything you wrote?"

There was a moment's pause where I couldn't help but hold my breath as I waited for her answer. Finally, after what felt like several days later although it was probably only a few seconds, she nodded.

"I meant every word," she said, so quietly that it would have been easy to miss.

Once again I felt that incredible something swell inside me, happiness mixed with guilt. I wished that she would look at me. Instead she was staring resolutely at my _Rent_ poster, but not really seeing it.

"We should talk about it," I said.

She scoffed quietly. "There's nothing to talk about."

"Yes, there is," I insisted. "You said in your letter that you..."

"Please," she interrupted. "Please don't say it out loud."

"It's nothing to be ashamed of, Quinn," I said gently. "You said you loved me."

She cringed at my words, like they were indecent, like they disgusted her.

"You said you've had feelings for me for a long time," I said softly. "...why?"

Finally she looked at me, her eyebrows raised. "What do you mean _why?"_

It was my turn to blush. I could feel the heat creeping up my neck. "Well, it's... it's _you_. Why would someone like you even have such strong feelings for _me_?"

She gave me a searching look and said "You think so little of yourself. Well, in this context anyway. There's a reason why I have... have such strong... f-feelings for you. Just like there's a reason why Finn wants to marry you, and why Jesse tried to win you back last year. You're a wonderful person, Rachel. And I don't know what you mean by _someone like me_. You of all people should know by now that I'm not perfect. Nowhere near."

Her eyes suddenly brimmed with tears and she looked away quickly.

"You're the prettiest girl I've ever seen," I said before I even realised that the words were out of my mouth.

"As flattering as it is to hear you say that," she whispered. "Being pretty doesn't make me perfect, Rachel. It doesn't make me deserve you."

A single tear rolled down her cheek and she quickly wiped it away. I wanted to comfort her, but I also wanted to respect her boundaries.

"It doesn't matter anyway," she said with a humourless chuckle.

"Why?" I asked quietly.

She took a deep, shaky breath to calm herself down. "You're getting married to Finn. What does it matter how I feel about you? You're not going to change your mind just because of me. I regretted writing that stupid letter the moment I left it in your locker. I never should have given it to you."

"No," I said. "I'm glad you did. It gave me a lot to think about. It made me wonder what would my life would have been like if you'd told me this sooner, how I would have felt if you'd told me you loved me back then."

"And how... how would you have felt?" she said nervously. "If I'd told you sooner... how would it have changed things?"

"It would have changed everything," I said, unable to stop myself from resting my hand on top of hers. "And I would have felt flattered... and surprised... and... and happy."

She looked at me again in shock, tears still in her eyes that she was clearing struggling to hold back.

"Happy?" she whispered incredulously. "You mean...?"

"I mean," I said. "If, before Finn and everything, you had asked me out... I mostly likely would have said yes."

She looked as if she couldn't believe her ears. "Really?"

I nodded and smiled, giving her hand a squeeze. "Like I said, you're the prettiest girl I've ever seen. But you're so much more than that too. I don't really like girls in that way, but I guess you're the exception, Quinn."

She laughed a little, tears falling down her rosy cheeks again, and I held onto her hand with both of mine. But suddenly her radiant smile turned into a wounded frown as she wiped the tears from her face.

"What's the point?" she said bitterly. "It's all well and good you saying this now, but it doesn't matter, it doesn't change anything. You're still going to marry Finn."

I felt a painful stab in my stomach. She tugged her hand away from mine and stood up suddenly, looking so heartbroken that it was unbearable.

"I should go," she said quickly. "I shouldn't have come here and I shouldn't have given you that letter. I'm so sorry, Rachel, but I just... I can't do this."

"Quinn, wait!"

I stood up and reached her before she got to the door, holding onto her arm and turning her around. She was looking anywhere but at me.

"Please just let me go, Rachel," she said desperately.

"But I don't want you to," I said earnestly.

I reached up and brushed her hair out of her face, wiping the tears from her cheek with my thumb. I felt her lean into my touch. I didn't even know why I was doing this. All I knew was that I didn't want her to leave.

"Stay with me, Quinn," I whispered, cupping her face with both hands. "Please, just... stay."

"Why?" she said, finally looking into my eyes.

I'd never noticed how perfectly gorgeous her eyes were – a startling greenish hazel colour – but they just did something to me, something amazing and entirely inexplicable. Rather than answer I leaned in, pulling her closer to me, and pressed my lips to hers in the softest of kisses. Quinn gasped before she let out a whimper and rested her hands on my hips, kissing me cautiously back. I'm not sure how long we stayed like that, but I honestly didn't care. The feeling of kissing her, the sensation of her soft lips against mine, was more than I ever could have imagined. Not that I'd ever imagined kissing a girl, but I never thought that it would feel so incredible, so _right_. Maybe it was just because it was Quinn. Once we separated I saw that her face was streaked with tears.

"I've waited so long for that," she whispered, a small smile on her face.

"And was it worth the wait?" I asked.

She nodded. "It was totally worth it."

I wiped more tears off of her soft cheek. "So will you stay now?"

She nodded again, her smile a little wider. She really was the prettiest girl I'd ever seen. We both leaned in at the same time and kissed again, chaste and gentle and impossibly perfect. She held me closer as our kiss deepened, one of her hands on the small of my back and the other running through my hair as I wrapped my arms around her neck. Kissing Quinn made me forget everything. There was nothing outside of my bedroom door, nothing in the whole world but me and Quinn and her soft lips against mine. There was no past or future or worry or consequence – just _this_.

We separated for a second so we could sit down on bed, hand in hand and our eyes never parting. I'd never seen her look at anyone with such pure adoration, such powerful love. When we kissed again I felt it from her, I could actually feel how much she loved me in the way her lips moved against mine and she stroked my cheek. It was like nothing I had ever felt before. I lay back against the bed and pulled her down on top of me, our kiss becoming harder and more passionate in a surprisingly short amount of time. She was laying half on top of me, her thigh comfortably between mine. I felt her tongue lick my bottom lip, asking tentatively from entrance which I happily gave. We both sighed as our tongues caressed, slow and sensual, while I ran my fingers through her short blonde hair.

We shifted so she was lying between my thighs, our bodies pressed even closer together, and I wrapped my legs around her hips like it was the most natural thing in the world. Our kiss became heated and fevered, one of her soft hands stroking my thigh, creeping slowly towards the hem of my skirt. I wasn't even thinking straight, but I knew more than anything that I wanted her to touch me – I never wanted her to stop. She kissed her way down my jaw and towards my neck, and threw my head back with a moan at the feel of her lips and teeth and tongue on my skin.

"I love you, Rachel," Quinn whispered huskily into my ear, making me shiver. "I want you so much... you should have been my first..."

I sighed at that, beyond words as she sucked on my earlobe. At that moment I agree with her. She should have been _my_ first. I pushed her cardigan off her shoulders and she sat up to take it off, before bringing me up with her so she could lift my polo shirt over my head. She unzipped her dress and lifted it over her head too, throwing it aside with the rest of our clothes so she was just in her underwear. She really was absolutely gorgeous.

I pulled her back down on top of me, wrapping my legs tightly around her as we kissed. Her skin felt hot against mine, our closeness making pleasure pool at my core. I begged her to touch me without words, and her hands cupped my breasts at once, squeezing gently and graving my nipples with her thumbs. I gasped into her mouth, my hands moving from her hair, down her shoulders and caressing her back. She kissed her way down my neck again, pressing her lips against my collarbone as her thumbs continued to rub against my nipples through the material of my bra. I was completely breathless underneath her, completely lost in her; her mouth on my skin and her hands and the taste of her lingering on my lips, an irresistible taste that I couldn't really describe.

I arched my back with a high moan when Quinn pinched my nipples, and she slipped her hand behind my back to unhook my bra and toss it aside. She took a second to look down at me, breathless and topless and most likely very red, and smiled.

"You really are so beautiful, Rachel," she said softly, brushing a strand of hair out of my face. "Especially like this."

I smiled back at her, so hopelessly turned on that I couldn't even think of a response. Quinn leaned down and kissed me, before moving her mouth lower and taking one of my nipples in her mouth. I moaned, grabbing handfuls of her hair, as she sucked on my nipple and caressed my breasts, moving from one to the other until they were both hard. She left a trail of kisses down my stomach to the waistband of my skirt, before sitting up and pulling my skirt off. She planted kisses all over my stomach and hips as she very slowly pulled my extremely damp panties down. I trembled with nervous excitement, with pleasure and need. Quinn kissed up and down my inner thighs, teasing me until I could have screamed.

"Please," I said breathlessly. "Please, Quinn... _please_..."

She looked up at me through her eyelashes and smirked, finally lowering her head between my legs. I let out a loud gasp and my whole body shivered as she dragged her tongue over my pussy, lapping at my wetness and toying with my clit with the tip of her tongue. She moved my leg so it was around her shoulder, her tongue licking deeper into my folds and her fingers rubbing my clit in circles. I tangled my fingers in her hair, whispering her name over and over again and bucking my hips forward without even realising.

My toes curled with the intensity of it all. I never, ever wanted her to stop, I never wanted this to end. But very abruptly she stopped and sat up. I whimpered in disappointment, but when I sat up I saw that she was removing her bra and panties, which had a dark wet patch at the crotch – I couldn't believe that _I _had done that. She lay back on top of me, catching my lips in a hard kiss as he fingers continued to rub my clit slowly. I moaned into her mouth, tasting myself on her tongue, and cautiously let my hands travel down her body. I cupped her perfectly round breasts in each hand, rubbing and pinching her nipples the way she had done to me and making her gasp into my mouth. My hands then slipped down her stomach and her hips, moving round to the small of her back and her ass. Finally, shaking, my fingers found her pussy – soaking wet and radiating heat – and began rubbing her hard clit in the same slow circles that she was rubbing me.

"Oh my God, Rachel," she moaned against my lips, her voice sounding deep and raspy and impossibly sexy.

She buried her face in my neck, making my skin tingle as she panted against me. We rubbed each other's clits faster and faster until suddenly she pushed two fingers inside me, making me cry out and arch my back off the bed. She raised her head, sitting up on her elbow to watch as she thrust her fingers into me faster and faster.

"You're so beautiful like this, Rachel," she whispered. "So, so beautiful..."

She bucked her hips against my hand as I rubbed her clit harder and faster, before I finally imitated her and pushed two fingers inside her. She felt so wet and hot around my fingers, and the moan she let out was the sexiest thing I'd ever heard. Our lips crashed together in a messy, desperate kiss as we fingered each other, and I lost myself in this – in Quinn and her fingers inside me and my fingers inside her and her tongue in my mouth and the incredibly erotic noises she was making.

Our movements soon became quick and erratic. We weren't so much making out as just panting against each other's mouths. We were glowing with sweat, saying each other's names in between moans and incoherent babble. I was so close. I never wanted this to end but I could feel the pressure building, and I knew Quinn was close too. Finally something snapped, and it was like a tidal wave was crashing over me as my orgasm hit. I cried out Quinn's name, throwing my head back against the pillows as seconds later Quinn's whole body shuddered and she screamed into my neck. I felt her clench around my fingers and cover my hand in her wetness, before we collapsed together on the bed, breathless and sweaty and completely spent.

Quinn rolled off of me and lay beside me on the bed, sucking her fingers, and purely out of curiosity I did the same. She actually tasted really good. I turned around and wrapped my arm around her, catching her lips in a very soft, slow kiss.

"I love you so much, Rachel," she whispered once our lips separated, turning around too so she could run her fingers through my hair.

That strange, inexplicable _something_ swelled inside me again as I looked into her eyes but now, after everything that had just happened, I knew exactly what that feeling was.

"I love you too, Quinn."

She smiled at me, her beautiful eyes lighting up. "Really?"

I nodded, kissing her again. "Really."

I could feel tears welling in my eyes that I determinedly held back. I was so incredibly happy, but I felt an awful stab of guilt as I thought about Finn. One simple letter really had changed everything. I didn't know what to do, but I didn't want to think about it. I didn't want anything to ruin this, just being with Quinn, holding her and kissing her. There was nothing outside of this bedroom. Just... _this_.

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><p>Before you ask, no, I have no idea how this is resolved. But never mind. Let's just assume that the Finchel wedding is off and Rachel and Quinn live happily ever after. Or something. Hope you enjoyed all the same, Humble Readers.<p>

xxx


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